By Lisa Barlow
Mindfulness
is defined by some as being attentive and aware, non-judgmentally. For me it is about absorbing yourself fully in the
present moment with all your senses. It’s about paying attention, giving full
attention to the here and now. This means neither worrying about the future nor
playing over and over mental tapes from the past. Having come from a place
where this kind of thinking was the norm I find concentrating on my breathing,
the basic inhale and exhale helps me to get into a more relaxed, mindful
state. Accepted, it is easier to do when
you are not in a stressful situation and are alone so it’s perhaps best to
practice first where you won’t be disturbed. Breathing deep into the belly also
helps. Lying on your back, place your hand gently on your belly and feel your
stomach move out with the inhale and in with the exhale. Try and breathe through your nose only. Yoga and meditation groups can help you with
this if you are struggling.
Becoming
more mindful helps us to start exploring our thoughts in more detail and
uncover unconscious tapes we play over and over. Some are helpful for our lives, some
aren’t. It’s up to us to uncover them
and then decide whether they are still fit for purpose and useful for our lives
as they stand today.
Often, we have developed strategies and responses that may have helped us as a child or young adult but could be causing us problems now! Before we respond to triggers (what people say or do, or situations that remind us of things from the past) it is helpful to become mindful of our thoughts to the trigger before responding with words and actions.
Through understanding and clarity of our own minds we can start to have more compassion with ourselves and others. Whatever comes from another person is their stuff, as our stuff is ours.We’re just trying to interact with each other the best way we can, bearing in mind we will all have different perceptions on the ‘truth’ based on what we have heard or seen. Communication is complex!!
Becoming aware of the words you use in your conversations, the intent behind them (your hidden motivations, if any), the tone you use and the body language you display can help to avoid misunderstandings that can lead to arguments and conflict. Becoming more mindful of thoughts, words and actions requires effort but I know from personal experience that all your relationships will benefit from some self exploration and taking the time to SLOW DOWN. Please take the time to truly smell the roses, this time will come just once, experience it fully. I have learned that our inner worlds can be whatever we want them to be, regardless of what is going on around us.
Often, we have developed strategies and responses that may have helped us as a child or young adult but could be causing us problems now! Before we respond to triggers (what people say or do, or situations that remind us of things from the past) it is helpful to become mindful of our thoughts to the trigger before responding with words and actions.
Through understanding and clarity of our own minds we can start to have more compassion with ourselves and others. Whatever comes from another person is their stuff, as our stuff is ours.We’re just trying to interact with each other the best way we can, bearing in mind we will all have different perceptions on the ‘truth’ based on what we have heard or seen. Communication is complex!!
Becoming aware of the words you use in your conversations, the intent behind them (your hidden motivations, if any), the tone you use and the body language you display can help to avoid misunderstandings that can lead to arguments and conflict. Becoming more mindful of thoughts, words and actions requires effort but I know from personal experience that all your relationships will benefit from some self exploration and taking the time to SLOW DOWN. Please take the time to truly smell the roses, this time will come just once, experience it fully. I have learned that our inner worlds can be whatever we want them to be, regardless of what is going on around us.
Reading I
have found useful relating to this topic:
Anthony
De Mello – Awareness
The
Dance – Oriah Mountain Dreamer (Useful meditation practices)
The
Art of Happiness – The Dalai Lama
Happiness:
A Guide to developing life’s most important skill – Matthieu Ricard
Joyful
Wisdom – Sogyal Rinpoche
Mindful
Manifesto: How doing less and noticing more can help us thrive in a
stressed-out world - Dr Jonty Heaversedge, Ed Halliwell
Power
of Now – Eckhart Tolle
The
Tibetan Art of Serenity – Christopher Hansard
For more information on Mindfulness and how you can incorporate it into your daily lives contact Lisa Barlow, Bare Health Personal Development Coach on 01260 408413
For more information on Mindfulness and how you can incorporate it into your daily lives contact Lisa Barlow, Bare Health Personal Development Coach on 01260 408413
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